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Emotional Intelligence Tip of the Week |
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This week let's focus on avoiding toxic people...
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…people that are negative, that find fault with everything we do, say unkind things (indeed, seem to get their happiness when putting other people down), bullies of some sort, people that are unable to compromise, etc.
I had an old acquaintance remind me of a certain co-worker that she and I had worked with many years ago. We discussed how negative the person was (and as it turned out corrupt). She told me that she left the organization due to her intuition that this person would be unhealthy to be around on a regular basis. And I thought, what insight because she was so right; this person became so toxic that he nearly destroyed the organization by being negative, manipulative and retaliatory when he did not get his way.
She avoided all of that by sensing her discomfort and moving away from the person to another organization, which
for her proved to be the right choice. We can also choose to stay in those circumstances but the emotional energy commitment can be intense and one needs to do a cost/ benefit analysis. As I get older, I tend to opt for the healthier (gently distancing or moving away completely) option rather than the tolerance/try not to react option.
Toxic people can suck the energy right out of us and disrupt our peace but only if we let them. It’s up to us. We cannot change them (even knowing this, at times many of us still try, and I understand it is because we feel there is so much at stake); but ultimately we can only change our approach or our environment.
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"Be peaceful… be a lifelong learner…and lead a meaningful life by assisting others…"
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